Pritam's Blog
Let’s Be Filmy, Let’s Love
So, I told my therapist that I am getting married.
“How do you feel about it?” She asked.
“Honestly speaking, a bit scared,” I said. “She is my best friend. And marriage ruins things. I am scared of losing her. Also, I am not a marriage material.”
“Even at your worst, you’ll still be worth it to the right person. And I think she considers you the right person. Otherwise, she wouldn’t have stuck around you for so long. Don’t you think?”
That was comforting. But I also realized I didn’t want to talk about it anymore. I wanted to leave it there when it’s still comfortable. So, I decided to change the topic.
“Might sound a bit personal. But are you married?” I asked.
“Nope. 38 and happily single,” she replied.
And the cinephile devil in me couldn’t resist it. “Itni badi ho gayi ho, abhi tak byah nahi hua?”
She chuckled. “You liked that movie? I loved it…”
“It’s one of my favorites,” I replied.
And I realized how I love to use dialogues from my favorite movies in conversations.
I remember once at work, a senior colleague was sitting beside me and working on her computer. A mosquito or fly, I do not remember exactly, appeared from somewhere and was bothering her.
She tried to drive it away but it kept on bothering her.
The SRK (from Devdas) in me rose and unlike the usual way people “hunt” mosquitoes - crushing it in between their hands by a measured and targeted clap in the air, I caught it by my hand.
I opened my palm and there it was - crushed and dead - which boosted my filmy feelings.
I was almost going to say, “Paaro, tumhe koi aur chhuye ye mujhe achha nahi lagta…”
Thank goodness, I didn’t say that. I wonder what would have been her reaction to that.
Suddenly, I started missing Pallabi. It’s been almost six months. Six fucking months. I so wanted to see her, hold her tight, and then say:
“Kaap kaahey rahi ho?” 🤣🤣🤣
Fuck. I am getting married.
But I guess it’s OK. If it doesn’t work out, we will deal with it.
Until then, let’s be filmy. Let’s love…